Monday, March 06, 2006

Notice to Science-Haters: For a clue, go see Carlsbad Caverns

The first thing that blows you away when you tour the Big Room of Carlsbad Caverns is the unfathomable amount of time it takes for single drops of mineral-laden water to form massive formations.

The second thing is that no one understands what the fuck the word 'whisper' means.

But back to the first. Why, Lord, are there people who believe that the earth was formed 10,000 years ago? That might seem like a really, really, really long time to a simple mind, but for the love of Jehosephat, we're talking about drops of water making gigantimous formations formed over rock that is already millions of years old. Drops. Of. Water. You do the math.

Do these folks visit the Caverns? Do they stand there and think "Gee, this stuff is almost as old as Jesus!"

Anticipating this, the National Park Service has provided the public with informative diagrams so that you can revel in the beauty of nature:

But still, I'm sure, Bubba Fundamentalist guffaws as his wife sheilds their children's eyes. Another mind boggler.

Now, I realize that for those of you who read this blog, making fun of said people is shooting fish in a barrel, but I just can't help wondering how you can ignore evidence like the caverns. Besides, they're frickin' beautiful! Wouldn't you rather believe that God is so all-powerful that a million-gajillion years is nothing at all?

Another pre-Jesus formation

When I was a kid, there was no conflict whatsoever in my mind with the idea that God created the world, that it took a shitload of time, and that the whole Genesis thing was, like other creation stories, passed down by humans who had only their imaginations to devise answers to such mysteries. Why do some fundamentalists feel so threatened these days that they feel they need to turn the clock back to the Dark Ages?

Awright, I'm done with the fish-shooting. I'm really glad the giddy little tot in me finally got to see the Big Room. And having done so makes me want to check out all the National Parks and Monuments. Ah, the original American Road Trip is on, baby. Stay tuned.


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